Figs isn’t a therapist, he is a magician; he is the frigging “Couples Whisperer.”
My wife and I were at the verge of separation and already had an appointment with a mediator to sort our complicated life out when, as a “last ditch effort,” I searched for therapists and found Figs here on Yelp and a little video blog of him talking about relationships with his wife. I was intrigued.
My wife and I have tried couples therapy in the past with mixed results and my wife was not at all interested in giving it another go. However I managed to convince her to go to one session to just see what happens.
Therapy with Figs was totally different. Communication problems and emotional disconnection are common issues in couples therapy, and therapy provides emotional support and tools to address these challenges.
We weren’t hashing over a bunch of “he-said she-said” arguments, trying to win over the therapist. Rather, Figs showed us how all our arguing, hurt feeling and misery were a result of two people who love one another who are not meeting the other’s emotional needs– this was sending us into a spiral were best intentions tended to land flat.
His method focuses on our process, and we realized that we never actually didn’t love another, we were just failing to give each other what we needed. Through couples therapy, we began a personal journey as a couple, discovering new ways to connect and grow together. Therapy helped us reconnect emotionally, rebuild trust after it had been broken, and enhance intimacy in our relationship.
We learned that each of our basic needs and perceptions are wholly different from our partner’s. By interpreting things from our own point of view we were missing what our partner actually needed and this was causing hurt feelings. In therapy, we developed new coping skills that help us manage our emotions and respond to each other with more understanding. Figs used evidence-based approaches, which helped us with managing stress and breaking destructive cycles like the pursue-withdraw pattern.
I now actually understand what my wife wants and she understands what I want. All our behaviors and fighting fit, incredibly neatly, into the treatment paradigm.
Marriage is rolling along quite happily now. We still have our arguments, but rather than lasting for days or weeks, we usually snap out of it in minutes or at most a couple hours. We learned practical strategies for managing conflict, which has made a huge difference in how quickly we resolve issues. Therapy helped us foster resilience and develop a more resilient partnership by addressing the root causes of dysfunction.
One more thing about Figs– he has one of the best senses of humor I’ve experienced in a person and a deep empathy for others. The strong therapeutic relationship he built with us was essential to our progress. In therapy, couples learn to listen actively, express emotions without blame, and reduce defensiveness, which supports emotional well-being. We always have a hearty laugh at his examples our ourselves as we understand the paradigm better and see ourselves in our process.
We always leave with more joy in our hearts than when we arrived.
Thank you, Figs!!!
Introduction to Couples Therapy and Counseling
Couples counseling, often referred to as couples therapy, offers a supportive environment where partners can openly address the challenges they face together. In a safe environment, most therapists strive to create a non-judgmental space for couples to address relationship issues, including low self esteem, self esteem, and daily life challenges. Guided by a licensed therapist—such as a licensed clinical social worker or a licensed professional counselor—couples counseling is designed to help partners navigate mental health concerns, including anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and even post traumatic stress disorder. In this safe and supportive environment, couples are encouraged to share their thoughts and feelings, while learning practical coping strategies to manage conflict and improve communication.
A clinical social worker or other licensed therapist works collaboratively with both partners, helping them understand each other’s perspectives and develop healthier ways to connect. Different types of therapists are available, such as mental health counselors, mental health therapists, family therapists, sex therapists, and licensed marriage and family therapists, all with specialized training in clinical psychology. The process is not just about resolving immediate issues, but also about building a foundation for long term success in the relationship. Therapists teach couples practical skills, walk alongside them in their journey, and are experienced in supporting individuals and young adults through various life transitions, including women’s issues and bipolar disorder. By addressing emotional needs and fostering resilience, couples counseling empowers partners to support each other’s mental health and well being, creating a stronger, more fulfilling partnership. Therapy supports proactive relationship maintenance beyond crisis management, and research shows that roughly 70% of couples experience meaningful improvement after therapy.
In Gordon Heights, NY, therapy options include private practices, specialized clinics, and providers offering both in-person and online therapy (telehealth), with many offering sliding scale fees and affordable therapy options. Support groups, stress management programs, and a holistic approach to mental health care are also available in the area. Therapists utilize evidence-based approaches such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), and the Gottman Method to address communication difficulties, relationship stressors, and increase intimacy. It is important to find a therapist who serves patients in your area, understands your needs, and can provide tailored treatment plans. Understanding the type of therapy you want before choosing a therapist is crucial, as therapists may have different specializations. Online therapy is available through platforms like BetterHelp, and many therapists offer text/call support for appointments. Local services support a wide range of relationship structures, including LGBTQIA+, polyamorous, and kink-identified couples. Therapists in Suffolk County offer strategies to build resilience in response to regional stress and anxiety, and therapy helps couples navigate financial stress, family conflicts, and other stressors that impact daily life. To access mental health services in Gordon Heights, call 631-600-3216.
Therapist Credentials and Qualifications
When seeking a therapist, it’s essential to consider their credentials and qualifications to ensure you’re receiving the best possible care. A licensed therapist, such as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) or a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), has undergone extensive training and education in their field. They have also gained practical experience working with clients and have developed a strong understanding of various therapeutic approaches.
A qualified therapist will work with you to create a personalized treatment plan, taking into account your unique needs and goals. They will provide a safe and supportive environment, where you feel comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings. This therapeutic relationship is built on trust, empathy, and active listening, allowing you to feel heard and understood.
Therapists specializing in family therapy, couples therapy, or individual therapy have extensive experience working with clients dealing with various mental health concerns, including mood disorders, substance abuse, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). They are equipped to provide compassionate support and guidance as you navigate life transitions, relationship difficulties, and emotional challenges.
In New York, you can find therapists with specialized support for issues like eating disorders, domestic violence, and personality disorders. Many therapists also offer group therapy sessions, providing a safe space for individuals to share their experiences and connect with others who may be facing similar challenges.
When searching for a therapist, consider their approach to therapy and their experience working with clients with concerns similar to yours. Look for therapists who use evidence-based practices, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or motivational interviewing, to help clients build resilience and develop coping strategies.
By finding the right therapist, you can embark on a personal journey of growth and self-discovery, improving your overall well-being and relationships. Remember, therapy is a collaborative process, and your therapist is there to support and guide you every step of the way. With the right therapist, you can overcome relationship challenges, improve communication, and foster a more fulfilling life.
