Living proof of work
By Fiachra "Figs" O'Sullivan
I didn’t come to this work because therapy fascinated me. I came because my own life stopped working the way it looked like it should.From the outside, things were fine. I was capable, articulate, and productive. But inside, my body was always braced. My relationships began to feel like another place I was trying not to fail. The strategies that had carried me through work and life started to cost more than they gave back.Teale and I are husband-and-wife couples therapists because we live inside these questions ourselves. We know what it’s like to be intelligent, devoted, and still miss each other. To manage the world well and struggle at home. Our work helps people slow things down enough for safety, repair, and real connection to return.If your relationship works on paper but feels strained in private, if you’re tired of holding it all together, you’re in the right place.
When "Good Friends" Isn't Enough
Beyond the "Dead Bedroom
The Attachment-Sex Connection
Common Issues We Address
Clinical research shows that 86% of couples improve after a brief period of EFT guidance, and 73% have maintained their improvements when we check back two years later.
Empathi's Methods
are proven to help
Clinical research shows that 86% of couples improve after a brief period of EFT guidance, and 73% have maintained their improvements when we check back two years later.
The Empathi Method for Intimacy
Stop struggling. Book your call now.
Now is the best time to strengthen your relationship
Acceptance The hardest part is just
getting started.
getting started.
Healing starts with accepting you need help, booking a free consult, and showing up as you are. Everything that comes next will be easier as you're held by an Empathi therapist and a proven process. From now on, you're not alone in this.
Alliance Feel like you're on the
same team again.
same team again.
Explore your process and discover a unified narrative where neither of you are wrong or right, “the good one,” or “the bad one.” Learn to approach suffering and conflicts as an “us” problem instead of a “them” problem or a “me” problem.
Empathy See the hurt and love behind their reactivity.
Strengthen your new narrative by accessing empathy to recognize the root of each other’s reactivity, how much you matter to each other, and what love is. Understand the cycles you get into with the help of your Figs.
Vulnerability Share the hurt and love behind your reactivity.
Get to know, live in, and share your vulnerable feelings. Then, learn to let in the ways that those feelings are understood and accepted by your partner through the power of the Empathi method and Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy.
Connection Feel deeply and securely bonded to one another.
Mend your relationship and your wounds through the understanding that you matter to each other. Learn to grieve, show up for, heal, and accept the most vulnerable parts inside of each other without sacrificing those parts in yourselves.
Resilience Rely on your bond to get out of stuck moments.
Having proved your ability to resolve long-standing issues, heated conflicts, and negative cycles, face your future together with a certainty that you will not only survive those moments, but grow stronger and more connected because of them.
We’re 5 Stars On Yelp!
Why Yelp Chooses Empathi Marriage Counseling
Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) provides our team at Empathi with an understanding of the emotional bonds between partners so that we can identify and work toward moments that strengthen and harmonize that emotional connection.
We use attachment-based frameworks to understand the ways very early bonds inform our adult behavior and choice of partner, as well as the ways our relationship with our partners inform how we understand those early bonds today. Being in a committed partnership then becomes more than just an agreement between two lovers – it is a healing art, a restorative power in the lives of both individuals.
Seeking the safety and containment of professional psychotherapy is a monumental first step on the road to turning painful patterns into a productive partnership. Committed exploration and a willingness to be curious and vulnerable about what is motivating one’s own behavior, reactivity, patterns, and choices can bring about positive change for your relationship – whether it’s steering a particular issue, transitioning toward compromise, or simply bringing about a newly deepened sense of passion and commitment.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What is the definition of a sexless marriage?
A: Clinical experts often define it as having sex fewer than 10 times a year. However, at Empathi, we believe a marriage is “sexless” the moment the lack of physical connection becomes a source of pain, distance, or loneliness for either partner.
Q: Can a sexless marriage survive?
A: Yes, but only if you move beyond the “mechanics” of sex and address the emotional disconnection. When you rebuild the “Secure Base” of your relationship, the sexual system often naturally restarts.
Q: Why did my partner stop wanting sex?
A: In most cases, it’s not that desire disappeared—it’s that the sexual system became a threat system. When emotional safety erodes, the body protects itself by shutting down. Your partner may be withdrawing not because they don’t want you, but because vulnerability feels too risky. The more intimate a relationship gets, the more loaded physical intimacy becomes.
Q: What if only one of us wants to work on this?
A: That’s actually very common, and it doesn’t mean therapy can’t help. Often the partner who seems reluctant is the one carrying the most shame or fear around the issue. We create a space where both partners feel safe enough to engage—not pressured. Many couples find that once the “pursuer-withdrawer” cycle is named, the reluctant partner feels relieved rather than resistant.
Q: How long does sexless marriage therapy take?
A: Every couple is different, but most begin to feel meaningful shifts within 8–12 sessions. Clinical research shows that 86% of couples improve after a brief period of EFT guidance, and 73% maintain those improvements two years later. The goal isn’t just to “have more sex”—it’s to rebuild the emotional safety that makes genuine desire possible.
Q: Is scheduling intimacy unromantic?
A: We hear this concern often. But here’s the reframe: scheduling intimacy isn’t about creating a checklist—it’s about creating a container where both partners commit to showing up transparently and vulnerably. You’re not scheduling performance; you’re scheduling presence. Many couples find that this intentionality actually deepens connection more than waiting for spontaneous desire ever did.
"With Empathi, Figs has created a fun and creative way to help people feel more connected in their relationship and to become acquainted with the transformational power of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy."
Dr. Sue Johnson
Creator of Emotionally-Focused Therapy for Couples
Empathi Marriage Counseling Near You
Find your city or schedule your free consult now and we’ll find the right therapist for you!
Empathi's
Therapy Services
Find the right counseling services for your situation.
Marriage Counseling
- Recognize the negative cycles you create together.
- Stop being so disappointed in each other.
- Connect in a deeper and more authentic way.
- Get back to experiencing joy, laughter, and fun together.
- Empathize with each other around stressful conflicts
- Learn to weather difficult times together.
Couples Therapy
- Stop having the same argument(s) over and over again.
- Recover from infidelity or other breaches of trust.
- Return to a deeper level of intimacy.
- Work on your relationship even though your partner doesn't seem available.
- Navigate life transitions from a place of connection and understanding of each other.
Couples Therapy
for Parents
- Learn to navigate parenting style differences.
- Get "unstuck" from disconnected routines and repetitive arguments.
- Get back in touch with a genuine appreciation for each other.
- Feel like you're on the same team again.
- Build a secure foundation your kid(s) will come to for support and look to as a model.
Individual Relationship
Therapy Services
- Break out of cyclical relation.ship issues through individual exploration
- Work through the unresolved trauma that's holding you back.
- Discover effective treatments for depression with the right ally and guide.
- Heal stubborn and pervasive self-esteem wounds.
- Become all you can be through a process of self-reclamation.