Fiachra Figs O'Sullivan: San Francisco Marriage & Family Therapy
Reach the love you’ve longed for.
…try to “fix” each other grow in resentment and shame.
…”problem-solve” in the short term experience repeat issues.
…develop surface-level skills feel helpless against persistent problems.
Through this approach, couples can unlock their ability to develop secure attachments and heal emotionally, fostering lasting change in their relationship.
My couples therapy methods were carefully crafted to guide people like you to the perspective shifts necessary to actually relieve relationship suffering for a lifetime.
Figs O'Sullivan: Wounded Healer
Discover the story that turned an ordinary man into the relationship expert Silicon Valley’s geniuses turn to.
Fiachra “Figs” O’Sullivan was born in Dublin, Ireland, where his early life and upbringing deeply influenced his compassionate approach to therapy and understanding of emotional processes.
As a child, Figs experienced moments of emotional pain and hurts that shaped his desire to help others navigate their own struggles.
Through his own life and work, Figs believes that personal and relational growth is an ongoing process, a part of life’s journey that involves continual self-discovery, healing, and building meaningful connections.
I had no business ever making love and relationship work.
The real story begins with the children of two broken homes who grew up feeling so much abandonment, rejection, shame, and fear… that they’d given up on making love work long before they met.
Over and over, Teale and I recreated those experiences from our childhood in our relationships.
I remember walking on a beach in San Francisco with my mother and telling her, “I’m sorry. I am never going to make you a grandmother.”
I felt so deeply not enough, and Teale was so convinced that she was too much*,* that a happy, fulfilling relationship seemed like a fairytale.
Is there an image or place that captures love or emotional pain for you? Sometimes, a single image can hold the feelings we carry from childhood.
And then we met…
Sparks flew…
And… eventually, the negative cycle continued.
1. Teale would see me as uncaring, become disappointed in me and then criticize me…
Which would lead me to see her as mean, get frustrated with her, and then withdraw from her…
Leading her to see me as even more uncaring… and on and on this painful cycle of disconnection went.
We call this awful dance the "Waltz of Pain."
What we would come to realize through years of discovering what would become The Empathi Method, was that this Waltz of Pain is a part of every relationship.
This wasn’t happening because I was broken, Teale was broken, or because we were with the wrong person…
We just didn’t understand how both of us were participating in and maintaining painful disconnection and how to work as a team against it. Embracing vulnerability—being emotionally open and authentic with each other—was key to breaking these cycles and fostering genuine connection.
Teale isn’t too much. I am enough.
We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.
Even though we had no role models to look up to as kids, we get to have the relationship of our dreams…
… We get to be the parents that we didn’t have when we were little…
… And now I’m a decade into a beautiful, healthy, connected marriage with my partner Teale, with two wonderful kids who get the dad they deserve. Having fun together as a couple is a key part of our relationship—it keeps things light-hearted, helps us stay connected, and makes the journey more enjoyable for both of us.
Types of Therapy Available in San Francisco
As a licensed marriage and family therapist in San Francisco, Fiachra Figs O’Sullivan brings a unique blend of expertise, authenticity, and heartfelt dedication to his practice. For Figs, being a therapist is never just a job—it’s a calling rooted in his own relationship journey and a deep desire to help others find the connection and intimacy they deserve.
At the heart of Figs’ approach is emotionally focused therapy (EFT), a powerful modality grounded in attachment theory. This perspective recognizes that our earliest experiences shape how we relate to our partners, and that the longing for connection is universal. Figs works closely with clients to uncover the patterns that keep them stuck in cycles of conflict or disconnection, helping them access and process their emotions through experiential psychotherapy. This process allows couples and individuals to easily dive deeper into the “stuff” that matters most, fostering a greater sense of empathy, understanding, and compassion.
Figs’ down to earth philosophy and warm, accessible style make it easy for clients to feel safe and supported as they explore their own relationships. He strives to create a space where everybody can be authentic, vulnerable, and truly seen—no matter where they are on life’s journey. As a passionate entrepreneur, Figs is dedicated to making therapy engaging and approachable, always seeking new ways to help clients grow and change their lives for the better.
In addition to emotionally focused therapy, Figs is trained in a range of modalities, including imaginal psychology, Gestalt Awareness Practice, and Hakomi. These approaches emphasize mindfulness, presence, and the capacity to access deeper layers of experience, allowing clients to gain new perspectives and build stronger, more connected relationships. Figs’ wife, Teale, is also a therapist, and together they offer a unique, real-world perspective on the challenges and joys of partnership.
For those curious about their own attachment style or looking to learn more about their relationships, Figs offers a free quiz on his website, Empathi.com. This tool provides valuable insights and a starting point for meaningful growth, helping clients and couples understand themselves and each other on a deeper level.
Whether you’re seeking to resolve conflict, build intimacy, or simply learn more about yourself, Figs’ San Francisco therapy practice offers a compassionate, non-judgmental space to begin your journey. With a focus on empathy, connection, and real change, Figs is dedicated to supporting clients as they move toward the fulfilling, connected relationships they’ve always longed for.
You can have the relationship you've longed for.
Our methods are proven to guide couples like you to the shifts necessary to actually relieve relationship suffering for a lifetime — again and again and again.
Fiachra “Figs” O’Sullivan’s mission is to change lives by helping individuals and couples transform their relationships and overall well-being.
With Figs O'Sullivan Couples Therapy You Will…
Return to a deeper level of intimacy
Experience supportive and engaging sessions designed for healing and connection
Learn to truly listen to your partner and foster empathy during therapy
Benefit from the use of humor to create a relaxed and open atmosphere in each session
Stop suffering. Book your call now.
Now is always the best time to strengthen your relationship.
San Francisco loves Couples Therapy with Figs O'Sullivan
Take it from the Fiachra Figs O’Sullivan . Clients often feel truly immersed in the therapeutic process with Figs, experiencing deep engagement and personal growth throughout their sessions. His attachment-based therapeutic orientation shapes his approach to couples therapy, guiding clients toward greater connection and understanding.
Contact
Fiachra Figs O'Sullivan LMFT San Francisco Office
Phone
(415) 967-3447
Address
999 Sutter Street, Suite 207, San Francisco, CA 94109
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Every couple has a pattern they cannot see. Find yours.
In love, each of you is a Relentless or a Reluctant, which makes you one of three kinds of couple: Relentless and Reluctant, two Relentless, or two Reluctant. The free quiz reveals your creatures and the cycle they fall into together. About three minutes.
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The Relentless
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