Figs O'Sullivan

Figs O'Sullivan is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT #79062) and the founder of Empathi. For 17 years he has helped couples move out of disconnection and back into secure, loving connection, drawing on Emotionally Focused Therapy and attachment science. With his wife Teale, he runs a San Francisco couples therapy practice, is a relationship expert to the Stars and Silicon Valley, and built Figlet, an AI relationship coach trained on their clinical work. His approach has guided more than 58,000 relationship assessments.

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Emotional Unavailability: The Silent Killer of Successful People’s Marriages

She Said “You Never Listen.” He Said “I Just Solved the Problem You Told Me About.” They’re Both Right. He sat across from me with the posture of a man who had prepared for a board meeting. Back straight. Hands folded. Face composed. His wife was crying next to him and he looked like he […]

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Why High Achievers Are Terrible at Vulnerability (And Why It’s Destroying Your Relationship)

The Same Traits That Built Your Career Are Destroying Your Marriage. Here’s Why. He was the most composed person in every room he entered. His team described him as “unflappable.” His board called him “steady under pressure.” His wife called him “a ghost.” She sat in my office and said, “I’ve been married to this

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Relationship Help San Francisco: A Comprehensive Guide to Resources

If you need relationship help San Francisco couples trust, you have more options than you probably realize. Whether you are looking for relationship help in the San Francisco Bay Area or beyond, this guide covers what actually works. The Bay Area has one of the most robust networks of relationship help San Francisco families and

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My Spouse Says I Work Too Much — What’s Really Going On

It’s Never About the Hours. It’s About What the Hours Mean. She sat on the couch with her arms crossed. He sat on the other end, leaning forward, hands clasped, already rehearsing his defense. “He works constantly,” she said. “I’ve tried everything. I’ve asked. I’ve begged. I’ve screamed. Nothing changes.” He jumped in immediately. “I’m

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Partner resents your startup couple arguing about work

When Your Partner Resents Your Startup: The Attachment Science Behind It

You’re Reading This After a Fight About Work. I Know. Let Me Explain What’s Actually Happening. It’s late. You’re in bed. Your partner is either asleep or pretending to be. And you just had the same fight you’ve had a hundred times. Maybe they said: “You’re never here.” Maybe they said: “The company matters more

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Discernment Counseling in San Francisco: When You’re Not Sure Whether to Stay or Go

One of you wants to fight for this. The other isn’t sure anymore. If you’re searching for discernment counseling in San Francisco, you’re probably living in exactly this moment. You’ve suggested therapy. Your partner said something like “I don’t see the point” or “it’s too late” or “I’ll go but I don’t think it’ll change

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Couples Therapy for Anxiety: How It Helps Both Partners

Couples therapy for anxiety exists because anxiety does not just live inside one person. When it moves into a relationship, it becomes a third presence in the room, shaping how you fight, how you connect, and how you interpret every look, silence, and text message. If your partner has anxiety, you already know this. You

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When One Partner Has Given Up: Is Couples Therapy Still Worth It?

You are the one still reading. You are the one who searched this question at midnight, hoping someone on the internet would tell you there is still a reason to keep going, even when one partner has given up. You are the one who suggested therapy, then suggested it again three months later, then begged.

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