It’s true that I’ve been practicing psychotherapy for years, but I have never, ever seen a patient. It’s just not how I view the people who come to me for help. They aren’t sick with a disease that I can cure; I’m not the holder of all wisdom who can diagnose, treat, and send them […]
I Don’t Treat “Patients” Read More »
One bit of advice that has emerged from the last 50 years of the personal development movement is to ask for our needs to be met. As a therapist, this drives me crazy. Talk to FigletFigs’ AI relationship coachHere now, ready when you are Every time you ask for connection, it lands as criticism. Do
Stop Asking for Your Needs to Be Met Read More »
Toxic behavior in a relationship is something most people assume only their partner is guilty of. But what if you are the one creating the toxicity? Recognizing your own toxic behavior in a relationship is the first and most courageous step toward real change. When our partner behaves like an ass, we think they should
Toxic Behavior in a Relationship: Sometimes You’re the Problem Read More »
I made this video to give prospective clients, and anyone curious about attachment-focused couples therapy, a chance to get a taste of how I, and others like me, help people feel more connected in their relationship. I only have so many hours in the week that I can actually sit with couples. I wish I
Monogamy isn’t the only way to live, but for many of us it’s the best path to the comfort, sense of belonging, and good health and longevity we deeply desire. The human species has developed a variety of relationship styles, influenced by both biology and culture, reflecting the diversity of our social behavior and mating
Is Monogamy the ONLY Way to be Truly Happy? Read More »
If you and your partner keep having the same fight over and over, you are not alone. Repetitive arguments are one of the most common reasons couples seek therapy. The good news is that understanding why you have the same fight over and over is the first step to finally breaking free from the cycle.
Stop Having The Same Fight Over and Over Again Read More »
Yes, it’s not about the nail: a couples therapy perspective. It’s about the system we create together when I feel abandoned or rejected and protest or withdraw when I perceive you (rightly or wrongly) as not being there for me in the ways that makes me feel securely connected/emotionally bonded to you. This in turn
We fight because our connection matters Read More »
