After 16 years of sitting with couples in the aftermath of infidelity, here are the frameworks I actually use in my clinical work, including concepts like One-Way Repair, The Splinter, and Competing Attachments that change how you understand betrayal and recovery.
By Figs O’Sullivan, LMFT | Updated April 2026 | 18 min read I spent two
By Figs O’Sullivan, LMFT | Updated April 2026 | 14 min read Here is something
Your breakup hurts because your nervous system is running a survival program millions of years old. Licensed therapist Figs O Sullivan explains the neuroscience of heartbreak, the dangerous Orphan Sovereignty pattern, and 7 steps to real recovery.
Fear of intimacy is not a character flaw. It is your nervous system doing exactly what it was designed to do. LMFT Figs O Sullivan explains the 7 hidden reasons closeness feels terrifying, the proprietary frameworks he uses with couples, and how to actually move through the fear without forcing it.
After 16 years as a couples therapist, here is what I know about toxic relationships that the internet gets dangerously wrong. The toxicity is not inside one person. It is in the space between two people who have lost the ability to repair.
By Figs O’Sullivan, LMFT | Updated April 2026 | 14 min read Let me tell
By Figs O’Sullivan, LMFT | Updated April 2026 | 14 min read Let me tell
Emotional neglect is the most misunderstood form of relational pain. It destroys more marriages than infidelity. Learn the 7 signs, the Waltz of Pain framework, and how to heal.
“Just set boundaries.” If you’ve spent more than ten minutes on the internet looking for
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